


"You always smile like you're about to cry"

by Leila_Elynol



Category: No Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:14:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27547426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leila_Elynol/pseuds/Leila_Elynol
Summary: This is not a fanfic, I just got a little overwhelmed looking for somewhere to post it, so I just posted it here.To be completely honest I don't know what this is, I don't even know what my writing is, cause I don't do it nearly enough, but I read this sentence ( the title) a few years ago, and this summer this collection of words poured out of me, now i got this urge to put it out.So please do enjoy, and thank you for gifting me with your time, hope you don't regret it.(PS: if you actually do read it, and know of a platform where this kind of work might fit better, I would be so grateful if you let me know)
Kudos: 1





	"You always smile like you're about to cry"

It was a still night, she thought as she took the few seconds of peace to inhale deeply the light air around her, it was also a cold one she realized a moment later as she collided against the damp walls of this hell hole she was in, her right shoulder was the one to take the hit this time, and tried as she may to stay upward, her legs failed to keep up with her stubborn pride, and she fell to her knees, head bent low. Another deep breath, yes, it was a nice night, she thought.

The hand that she had now became all too familiar with wrapped around her upper arm and dragged her to her feet, the other one of the set reached under her chin to make her look up into the deepest horrors she has ever seen in the form of eyes.

"Now, was that worth your words baby?" his words came sharper than the hit, as he straightened her to face him completely, to make her further look into the eyes of her jailer while holding on to the last of what remained of every hopeful feeling she had possessed.

She nodded weakly.

"Worth every. Single. bruise" She managed to say, eyes locked with his as a strand of hair fell over them.

His eyes hardened immediately, as a new wave of rage washed over his face, he threw her roughly to sit on the metal chair that had become her only luxury these past ten days.

Ten whole days, she could hardly believe it, and had only kept count because he constantly reminded her of it, because the sun never shone through these windowless walls, but she'd catch a slip in their words, to which she clang, to keep count of the time passed here. 

To think, that only ten days and a couple hours ago she had been living a young girl's life, of standing somewhere under the sunshine, somewhere where mold, insects and blood wasn't the decor options to cover a brick wall, but most of all, she'd been living a blissful existence, of not knowing the monster standing now two meters from her even existed. 

There was a few of them, she'd counted six until now, but he was the worst, because he always stayed behind at first, always came back, and then ended up taking full charge of her.

Ten days, she had to remind herself as the flashing memories of this period started to play across her mind, it was only ten days, she kept telling herself to put it into a sort of perspective that could maybe show this whole experience as less than it was, maybe her mind would win if she'd tried hard enough, maybe the blood that had now long dried on her hair, clothes and under her fingernails, and the different shades of blue and green that colored her body could be overcome, if her mind was strong enough, and that was her game plan since day one.

Day one, when she'd opened her eyes, and found herself sitting in that same chair, with two men standing in front of her talking amongst themselves ,while the third one, the one she would came to know as the stuff nightmares were made of, the worst monster of all , was a bit further away, keeping to himself. 

The two man, who were just as terrifying, had talked and talked the first hours of that day 

"...we'll keep you until it's done.." "you'll find it better for yourself if you corporate..." 

"... the only purpose you'll serve to us..." "....we'll wait until he surrenders but it'll be faster if you .." and an abundance repetitions of the words hurt, bad, pretty and the phrase "...he won't find you so you better ..."

She had listened carefully, forming all the missing pieces in her mind from scrapes that they said between all the threats to get the full picture of what was happening, because worst then anything that can befall her by their hands, would be to be completely clueless in the face of it.

" So what say you?" said Red.

That was obviously not his real name, but it was the one she assigned to him in her mind, he was red because he was the first one to make it drip out of her face as he busted her lip in respond to her answer.

She had tilted her head back laughing after a few moments of silence to his question and had said : " Well, your offer is very tempting my good sir" she said in her best elegant voice "but i must refuse it, for i know i have nothing to fear, he will indeed come for me" she added looking at his face, flashing him a broad smile, and sure enough, the blow to her left cheek came short afterward.

"Now that didn't seem like nothing to me, did it?" Red had said as he watched the blood drip from her bent head to the floor.

When she overcame the initial shock of the pain, because truth was she was not used to it at all, and her body will not withstand much of it, she gathered her mind determination as her only weapon to fight. 

"Be that" She said spitting the blood that had gathered in her mouth to the side "as it may, it is still no" 

Her very own demon sent from hell, or Blue as she called him, a name he had earned himself from the first and nasty bruise across her abdomen that he gifted her that afternoon, had stirred from his position in the back, coming closer examining the situation with as much nonchalant and indifference as if he was watching a mattress commercial.

"And you think you can last?" Asked the third man, Orange, laughing. 

He was orange because that was the color of vomit and that is exactly the need he evoked in her, by his manners, his speech, and even by just looking at him.

But it had seemed that that was a question that the three men were bent on solving, Red and Blue taking turns, making her their punching bag, while Orange refrained, only laughing from time to time, clicking his teeth in the silent intervals.

As the first afternoon progress they hadn't asked again, and she was more grateful for that than for anything else in her life, because had they stopped between the blows to the ribs and the pulling of hair to squeeze her throat tighter, to ask if she had reconsidered, she wouldn't be sure what her answer might be. But thankfully, they had taken more of a clinical approach to their method, and looked so detached while inflicting pains she could not even imagine possible, as her screams filled the room until very late that day, when they decided to leave without another word, leaving her with a biggest collection of bruises and cuts in those few hours, than she had acquired in all of her twenty three years of life.

She was an honest person, who always gave credit where it was due, and so she had to admit that they were men very dedicated to their jobs, as their visit very early the next morning proved, to find her still laying in the same fatal position they had left her in.

"Have you made up your mind?" Red's voice was too loud as it slammed against her still ringing head. 

Have to stand up , was the only thing going through her mind, and so she did, very slowly.

"Actually I did" she said trying to move around and to sound relax, but her small voice betrayed her " I know it's still early but..." she stopped to cough, wrapping an arm around her rips to soften the effect, then brought herself to face Red Completely.

"I just want a hamburger thank you" She said smiling at him as if she were truly standing at the other side of a cashier placing her lunch order "no pickles, no onions, extra sauce please" she added in the same friendly tone.

"It seems this won't be easy for you" Red said calmly in response.

"Not if i don't get my breakfast, it won't"

Red nodded his head repeatedly, moving to close the door behind him, and proceeded to start that day's activity, in the same spirit of honesty, she had to admit, they weren't very strong in the creative side, because it all looked too much like yesterday's practice.

So for the purpose of not being repetitive, the days after that could be simply described as having seen little change, to be exact there were but the two, the one in her health being one, her body seemed on the very brink of breaking, but she made her mind stronger every time, they will not get what they want. The second one in Blue, where he repaid every resilience on her part by staying a little longer after Red had left, and every laugh by more interest, in the very worst way until he became her constant companion.

Some days were good, like the fifth one, where none of the primary colors came, but still Orange was there, and he had talked some nausea inducing words for what seemed like a century. 

"... and i know there are other ways, i mean the boys are bruising their knuckles over you, but you are a very pretty girl, even hidden under that now broken body of yours, I'm sure i can think of another way to hurt you and come out smiling at the end" he had said in the middle of his long speech, and that sent every alarm in her head ringing, and mentally slapped herself for overlooking this scenario and not considering a resisting way out, but that was no more, because that night she did just that in the dark.

In the sixth day, Blue was there alone, after an hour or so, if you asked her she'd say they felt like twelve, he rested his hands on the arms of the chair she was siting on to support himself as he leaned closer.

"Was that enough? will you give me your yes now or will you wait a bit longer?" he asked her calmly

One, two, three deep breaths, before she could lift her head

"Oh but i am truly waiting" said she, then smiled and met his gaze "for him" 

The mention alone usually infuriated him to such an extent, but this time it seemed he could look past it.

"You always smile like you're about to cry" he said, puzzled eyes fixed on hers "why the show, baby?" 

it was the first time he used that word, and every hair on her body stood by utter disgust of it.

"Give in" he told her softly.

"to you?" her expression was pure disbelieve and disgust "Never" looking away smirking as if the mere consideration of giving up to them was the strangest thing she'd lived since meeting them.

Apparently, that was the wrong attitude to take, because that day had been longer than all the rest.


End file.
